The
Washington Post's Style Invitational once again asked
readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter
it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and
supply a new definition. Here are this year's winners:
1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which
lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.
2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
3. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people
that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone
layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking
down in the near future.
4. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for
the purpose of getting laid.
5. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which
renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite
period.
6. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
7. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic
wit and the person who doesn't get it.
8. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you
are running late.
9. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got
extra credit.)
11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending
off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like,
the Earth explodes and it's like a serious bummer.
12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through
the day consuming only things that are good for you.
13. Glibido: All talk and no action.
14. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to
seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
15. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed
just after you've accidentally walked through a spider
web.
16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito
that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning
and cannot be cast out.
17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding
half a grub in the fruit you're eating.
And the pick of the literature:
18. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.
Want to see the 10 Worst Album Covers of all time? Go here!
GROANERS
A jumper cable walks into a bar. The barkeep says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."
A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "Sorry we don't serve food in here."
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says, "A beer please, and one for the road."
"Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home.'"
"That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome."
"Is it common?"
"It's not unusual."
Two cows standing next to each other in a field, Daisy says to Dolly. "I was artificially inseminated this morning."
"I don't believe you," said Dolly.
Daisy exclaimed,"It's true, no bull!"
Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I've lost my electron."
The other says, "Are you sure?"
The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..."
I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any. I went to a seafood disco rave last week...and pulled a mussel.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?... A fsh.
FOR THOSE WHO ENJOY LANGUAGE (OR SEVERE DISTORTIONS)
A backward poet writes inverse.
A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.
Dijon vu - the same mustard as before.
Practice safe eating - always use condiments.
Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or .
Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play.
Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
Reading while sunbathing makes you well red.
When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.
A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two-tired.
What's the definition of a will? (It's a giveaway.)
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
In democracy your vote counts. In feudalism your count votes.
She was engaged to a guy with a wooden leg but broke it off.
A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed.
With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.
When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.
The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.
You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
Local Area Network in Australia: the LAN down under.
He often broke into song because he couldn't find the key.
Every calendar's days are numbered.
A lot of money is tainted -- It taint yours and it taint mine.
A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.
He had a photographic memory that was never developed.
A plateau is a high form of flattery.
A midget fortune-teller who escapes from prison is a small medium at
large.
Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.
If you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.
Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.
Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.
Acupuncture is a jab well done.
Those who jump off a bridge in Paris are in Seine.
Lipstick in School
According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington recently was faced with a unique problem.
A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints. Every night, the maintenance man would remove them and the next day, the girls would put them back. Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night. To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required. He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it. Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.
There are teachers, and then there are educators!
The photos below were voted by readers as the best images of the past year ...
1. Swallowed whole
A rainbow trout fingerling peers out from the gullet of a northern pike at the Alaska Department of Fish & Game aquarium in Anchorage.
2. A romp in Russia
A polar bear cub plays near his mother at the Moscow Zoo.
3. Moonshot
Flying at nearly 35,000 feet, a jet passes over the disk of a winter half moon above Boston on Jan. 3 The jet leaves contrails in its wake due to the temperature difference between the hot engine exhaust and the cold air.
4. Red Square reflection 
The Kremlin's Spassky Tower and passers-by are reflected in the wet cobblestones of Moscow's Red Square on Feb. 13.
5. A galaxy's sharp edge
An image produced by the Hubble Space Telescope, released March 1, shows a perfect "edge-on" perspective of the galaxy NGC 4013, with huge clouds of dust and gas extending above the galaxy's main disk.
This is what The Dalai Lama has to say on the millennium which began 01/01/2003.
Instructions for Life in the new millenium from the Dalai Lama:
1. Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
2. When you lose, don't lose the lesson.
3. Follow the 3 Rs: Respect for self, respect for others, and responsibility for all your actions.
4. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
5. Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.
6. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
7. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
8. Spend some time alone every day.
9. Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values.
10. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
11. Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you'll be able to enjoy it a second time.
12. A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life.
13. In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don't bring up the past.
14. Share your knowledge. It's a way to achieve immortality.
15. Be gentle with the earth.
16. Once a year, go some place you have never been before.
17. Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.
18. Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
19. Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon.
From Texas Observer
Fuzzy on Clear Channel
Anyone who read S.C. Gwynne's analysis of Clear Channel Communications in
the April issue of Texas Monthly only got the North Dallas fur-coat-set
version of a much bigger, more complex story. The subhead of the story,
"The Voice of America," asked the question, "Has the company that everyone
loves to hate gotten a bum rap?" Well, has it?
The article-which determines that consumers should "blame Congress" for the
San Antonio-based behemoth's chokehold on American radio-fails to mention
the lawsuit filed by Denver-based concert promoter, Nobody in Particular
Presents, against Clear Channel in 2001. The suit, which was covered by
almost every major news outlet in America, alleged that the radio giant's
subsidiaries, Clear Channel Radio and Clear Channel Entertainment (which
owns dozens of live music venues) , conspired to shut out rival promoters
and threatened recording artists who worked with promoters outside the Clear
Channel orbit. According to Harper's magazine, Clear Channel won a
protective order in the case, a move that has hamstrung Nobody in Particular Presents.
Gwynne's story doesn't mention that many connections between George W. Bush
and the big shots at Clear Channel. Clear Channel's founder and CEO, Lowry
Mays, has been a major Republican donor for years. Tom Hicks, a director of
Clear Channel and one of the its biggest individual shareholders, was the
man who made Bush into a multimillionaire when he bought the Texas Rangers
from Bush and his fellow investors in 1998. Furthermore, while Bush was
governor, Hicks was chairman of the University of Texas Management Co., the
venture capital entity that was investing the university's money in various
ventures, some of which Hicks controlled. Clear Channel's considerable
stroke in Washington is also ignored. The Monthly omitted that
super-lobbyist and former Clinton White House insider Vernon Jordan was,
until very recently, on Clear Channel's board. Nor does it mention that
Jordan's spot on the board was taken by former Oklahoma Congressman J.C.
Watts, a conservative black politico who was one of the Republican Party's
rising stars until he quit Congress last year.
Finally, the magazine glossed over Clear Channel's considerable involvement
in supporting several Pro-Iraq war rallies in March of 2003. The rallies,
supported Clear Channel stations in Atlanta, Cleveland, San Antonio,
Cincinnati, and other cities, attracted as many as 20, 000 people. They
were designed to counter the many anti-war rallies being held around the
country. While the Clear Channel stations were promoting patriotism, flag
waving, and the invasion of Iraq, they bounced a pair of talk show hosts
who opposed the war. Charles Goyette, a conservative talk show host at
Phoenix radio station KFYI, was demoted from his drive-time afternoon talk
show after he repeatedly questioned the motives behind the war. Goyette
wrote about his fight with Clear Channel in the February issue of The
American Conservative magazine. Goyette is now looking for a new job.
Another talk show host, Roxanne Walker, who identifies herself as a liberal,
lost her job at WMYI, a Clear Channel station in South Carolina, shortly
after the war began. Walker had gone on the air repeatedly arguing against
the war. In July of 2003, she told CNN that she believes she lost her job
because of Clear Channel's conservative politics. "The company felt that it
was okay to have political discussions that were pro-war and pro-Bush but
wanted to restrict any opposing viewpoints." Walker, who was named the 2002
Radio Personality of the Year by the South Carolina Broadcasters
Association, has filed a lawsuit against the radio giant. None of these
issues would have been difficult to research or discuss. But then again,
you wouldn't want to ruffle those minks.
TAKE A MINUTE AND HAVE A LAUGH (OR CRY)
THE STELLA AWARDS
It's time once again to review the winners of the annual
Stella Awards. The Stella's are named after Stella
Liebeck spilled coffee on herself and successfully sue
McDonald's. That case inspired the Stella awards for the
move frivolous successful lawsuits in the United States.
Here are this year's winners:
5th Place (tie):
Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded $780,000
by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping
over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store.
The owners of the store were understandably surprised at
the verdict, considering the misbehaving little toddler
was Ms. Robertson' son.
5th Place (tie):
19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000 &
medical expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with
a Honda Accord. Mr. Truman apparently didn't notice
there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was
trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps.
4th Place:
Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving a
house he had just finished robbing by way of the garage.
He was not able to get the garage door to go up since the
automatic door opener was malfunctioning. He couldn't
re-enter the house because the door connecting the house
and the garage locked when he pulled it shut. The family
was on vacation, and Mr. Dickson found himself locked in
the garage for eight days. He subsisted on a case of
Pepsi he found, and a large bag of dry dog food. He sued
the homeowner's insurance claiming the situation caused
him undue mental anguish. The jury agreed to the tune of
$500,000.
3rd Place:
A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson
of Lancaster, Pennsylvania, $113,500 after she slipped on
a soft drink and broke her coccyx (tailbone). The
beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson had thrown it
at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.
2nd Place:
Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, successfully sued the
owner of a night club in a neighboring city when she fell
from the bathroom window to the floor and knocked out her
two front teeth. This occurred while Ms. Walton was
trying to sneak through the window in the ladies room to
avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded
$12,000 and dental expenses.
1st Place:
This year's runaway winner was Mrs. Hazel Grazinski of
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. Mrs. Grazinski purchased a
brand new 32-foot Winnebago motor home. On her first trip
home, just having driven onto the freeway, she set the
cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the drivers seat
to go into the back and make herself a sandwich. Not
surprisingly, the RV left the freeway, crashed and
overturned. Mrs. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not
advising her in the owner's manual that she couldn't
actually do this. The jury awarded her $1,750,000 plus a
new motor home. The company actually changed their
manuals on the basis of this suit, just in case there
were any other complete morons buying recreation vehicles.
1. No piece of paper can be folded in half more than seven (7) times.
2. You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching television.
3. The king of hearts is the only king without a mustache.
4. Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.
5. Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.
6.The first owner of the Marlboro Company died of lung cancer. So did The first "Marlboro Man."
7. Walt Disney was afraid of mice.
8. A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why.
9. Pearls melt in vinegar.
10. Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least six (6) feet away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from the flush. (It's time to keep your toothbrush under your pillow)
11. The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as a substitute for blood plasma.
12. American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one (1) olive from each salad served in first-class.
By Elysa Gardner
USA Today
PATTTI SMITH
Patti Smith wants you to listen to her new CD, honor your parents and become engaged in the upcoming presidential election, although not necessarily in that order. Chatting over a bowl of matzoball soup in a restaurant just downstairs from her West Village apartment, the 57-year-old rock icon speaks with the quiet conviction of someone accustomed to having her thoughtfulness recognized.
"I'm proud of the record and excited about it," Smith says of Trampin', which arrives Tuesday. "But the thing my band and I are really going to be focused on is encouraging people to get out there, register and vote. I'd rather talk about the things that really concern people, though the record does address those concerns, so I don't feel that guilty talking about it."
Smith's reputation for frankness dates back to the '70s, when albums such as Horses and Easter established her as one of New York rock's leading poets. Trampin' is her first CD since 2000's Gung Ho and only her ninth in 28 years.
The socially and politically conscious songs on Trampin' include Gandhi, a fervent ode to the late Indian leader and peace advocate, and Radio Baghdad, which Smith wrote from the point of view of an Iraqi mother trying to comfort and reassure her child as American troops are bombing their neighborhood.
"I've been speaking and marching against the Bush administation ever since his tenure began," Smith says. "The present administration has confused the American people by linking nationalism to patriotism. To me, a patriot is someone who constantly asks questions of his government and demands answers.
"Thomas Jefferson counseled us to be vigilant in watching our government and to overturn it if it wasn't representing us properly."
Smith adds, however, that she's "not trying to influence how people use their voices. I just want them to vote. It's not only our right but our responsibility, whether it's for a Democrat, a Republican or a third-party candidate."
But the singer leaves no doubt about which lever she'll pull in November. "I campaigned very heavily for Ralph Nader in 2000, and some people were angry at me for it. I'd ask them, 'Well, how strongly do you feel about your candidate?' They'd say, 'I'm voting for him.' And I'd say, 'I'm not just voting for Ralph; I'm giving out fliers on the street, going door to door, singing for him.'
"My father had voted for Ralph all through the '60s, writing his name in. He passed away before the 2000 election, in which I had been working for Bill Bradley. When Bradley's chances were snuffed, the Nadar camp called and asked me to examine what they were doing. I had always thought of Ralph as my father's guy, but then I heard him speak, and I understood. He's an honest man and a great teacher who understands our law, knows our Constitution inside our and lives by it. It makes sense that he would appeal to my father, who was a highly intelligent and open-minded man but also one of high moral standing."
Trampin' also was inspired by Smith's mother, Beverly, who died in 2002, and by the singer's own 16-year-old daughter, Jesse, who plays piano on the title track, a spiritual famously sung by the late operatic contralto Marian Anderson. (Smith's son Jackson is also a musician;his band, Back in Spades, has opened for Smith's.)
"I don't sit and plan my albums conceptually, but I did notice that motherhood is a big theme on this one." The CD's first track, Jubilee, "is about the American mother, the American female who loves her land and wants us to embrace its beauty. But then she looks around and sees that something is wrong. She's a mother, she's instinctive. So she says,' Come on, people, gather round; we know how to make change.'
Another song, Cartwheels, was written for Jesse. "It's from teh perspective of a mother looking at her beautiful daughter looking at the world and at how overwhelming life is."
In between, fittingly, is Mama Rose, "which was written for my mom. She was a strong figure, and I was very close to her. I like to think she's still within me and that her spirit is magnified within this record."
Fans can learn more about Smith's personal and political perspectives on her new Web site, www.pattismith.net.
"We observe different holy days, share cultural information and health information and pay homage to certain people.
"Hopefully, it will be a place that people can visit and be inspired to read a new book or hear some interesting new music, or become concerned about whatever issue is important to the plight of our fellow man.
"I'm not a politician, but I'm a citizen and a human being and a mother, and I have thoughts and feelings. We all do, you know? And we should all ahve teh right to express them."
The Idea of the Good
A case can be made for the idea of the good's being the most important idea. Consider. All action aims at preservation or change. When we aim to preserve, we desire to avoid something worse, devolution, decay. When we aim at change, we desire something better, improvement, recuperation, perfection. So all action arises from ideas of what is better and what is worse. This is why ideas are so important in life.
So in order to act, as opposed to merely being acted upon, we need to have at least an opionion about what is the good to be achieved. But more than that, we want our opinion to be true. So we need to know what truth is. And this means: we need to have knowledge of the idea of the good. Otherwise all action is suspect. We might be acting well, but in the wrong direction. We might not know what we are doing, because we are mistaken about the goodness of our destination. Some have thought as much.
Thinking this way suggests a dark but hopeful picture of how we are implicated, our human condition: things are not necessarily what they seem. In ways we cannot immediately appreciate, we live as prisoners to our preconceptions. This is a strange kind of bondage, one difficult to be freed from. It is the very fact of our ignorance of what is truly good that we are ignorant of. And if we do not know that we are prisoners, then we can never try to escape.
We cannot even want to try to escape.
But according to this view, all is not lost. Each time we feel the force of a question, we are taking a miraculous step out of the subterranean home we are born into. Each time we feel dissastisfied by the answers we've already been saddled with, we grasp the questions those answers were designed to preempt. For if we already have all the answers, then what good are the questions.
Answers can leave us blind, and questions can make us see. Socrates said as much in his defense of the examined life. But isn't it also possible to overestimate the difficulty of achieving happiness? After all, illusory chains can blind too. Sometimes, the grass just looks greener, and the life that we don't have, happier. And then the problem is not having knowledge but not having gratitude.
For isn't it obvious that we know already what is good in life, what is important in life? What stops us from accepting life in all of its goodness?
When we learn the idea of goodness as children, we learn to say "This ice cream is good," and "Be good to your little sister." And then we learn to mean it, to think about what it means to say it, to respond to it, to live in such a way that it matters that we understand what it means.
But what does it mean to call something 'good' and to mean that something is good? Here's a possibility. Being good is being able to see what is good and to call what is good "good," and to tell others why you think it is good, and to listen to others when they point out to you that something is good. And to believe in goodness itself.
You are good.
I think so anyway.
Justin Vood Good, Boston University
I celebrate myself, and sing myself, And what I assume you shall assume, For every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you. Walt Whitman
This time, like all times, is a very good one if we but know what do with it. Ralph Waldo Emerson
When you jump for joy beware that no one moves the ground from beneath your feet. Stanislaw Lec
Surely the strange beauty of the world must somewhere rest on pure joy! Louise Bogan
Seize from every moment its unique novelty and do not prepare your joys. Andre Gide
Be happy. It's one way of being wise. Colette
In spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart. Anne Frank
It is only in the heart that anything really happens. Ellen Glasgow
Throw your heart over the fence and the rest will follow. Norman Vincent Peale
The logic of the heart is absurd. Jule de Lespinasse
Nobody has ever measured, even the poets, how much the heart can hold. Zelda Fitzgerald
The heart is the real fountain of youth. Mark Twain
Luck is not chance It's toil Fortune's expensive smile Is earned. Emily Dickenson
To a brave man, good and bad luck are like his right and left hand. He uses both. St. Catherine Of Siena
Be grateful for luck, but don't depend on it. William Feather
Chance is the first stem you take, luck is what comes afterwards. Amy Tan, The Kitchen God's Wife
Go and wake up your luck. Persian Proverb
You can't hope to be lucky. You have to prepare to be lucky. Timothy Dowd, NYPD
The bad news is time flies. The good news is you're the pilot. Michael Althsuler
Live not as if you had ten thousand years before you. Necessity is upon you. While you live, while you may, become good. Marcus Aurelius
What you can do, or dream you can begin it; Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. Goethe
You can't do anything about the length of your life, but you can do something about its width and depth. Evan Esar
Don't be too squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better. Ralph Waldo Emerson
If there is no wind, row. Latin Proverb
Use what talent you possess: the woods would be very silent if no birds sang except those that sang best. Henry Van Dyke
Our doubts are traitors, And make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt. William Shakespeare
Do what you can, with what you have, where you are. Theodore Roosevelt
Get rid of the tendency to judge yourself above, below, or equal to others. Abhirupa- Nanda
Each of us feels the torn lining of his own coat and sees the wholeness of the other person's. Erica Jong
Everyone is indispensable. Jean Renoir
You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you this look that says, "My God you're right! I never would have thought of that!" Dave Berry
The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches but to reveal in him his own. Benjamin Disreali
People will forget what you did, people will forget what you said, but they won't forget the way you made them feel. Anonymous
True friends are those that really know you but love you anyway. Enda Buckanan
What do we live for if not to make life less difficult for each other? George Elliot
Laughter is not at all a bad beginning for a friendship, and it is far the best ending for one. Oscar Wilde
It's the ones you can call up at 4 a.m. that matter. Marlene Dietrich
And crowned thy good with brotherhood From sea to shining sea. Katherine Lee Bates, 1893
Give me your tired, your poor, /Your huddled masses yearning to breath free. Emma Lazarus
And I know/ I know I'll always burn: burn for you/ With a fire inside, so hot and blue. Dago
Acquire inner peace and a multitude will find their salvation near you. Catherine de Hueck Doherty
I'm a universal patriot, if you could understand me rightly: my country is the world. Charlotte Bronte
A patriot is one who wrestles for the soul of her country as she wrestles for her own being. Adrienne Rich
Here is a closer view of Zissou and our tire-boat. To operate simply slide your legs into a pair of waders sealed to the bottom of the hull, and then "walk" through the water. For us it was at last an answer to the old question in the famous nursery song: "Maman, do the little boats have legs?" J.H. Lartigue
The best way to have a good idea is to have lots of ideas. Linus Pauling
One's mind, once stretched by a new idea, never regains its original dimensions. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Don't worry about people stealing an idea. If it's original you will have to ram it down there throats. Howard Aiken
A good idea will keep you awake during the morning, but a great idea will keep you awake during the night. Marilyn Vos Savant
Imagination is more important than knowledge. Albert Einstein
An idea that is not dangerous is unworthy of being called an idea at all. Oscar Wilde
To be good is noble, but to teach others how to be good is nobler--and no trouble. Mark Twain
No one can be good for long if goodness is not in demand. Bertold Brecht
The only good is knowledge and the only evil is ignorance. Socrates
Non-cooperation with evil is as much a duty as is cooperation with good. Mohandas Gandhi
The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing. Edmund Burke
Good, the more communicated, more abundant grows. John Milton
On the whole, human beings want to be good, but not too good, and not quite all the time. George Orwell
When you don't have anything to do or anything to drink or anything--it's good to suck on rocks. You can survive sucking on rocks, you can. Jesse Maxwell Good, Tuesday adternoon May 22, 1979
I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it. Garrison Keillor
Whether you think you can, or you can't, you are usually right. Henry Ford
I have not failed, I 've just found 10,000 ways that won't work. Thomas Alva Edison
If you can spend a perfectly useless afternoon in a perfectly useless manner, you have learned how to live. Lin Yutang
If you don't know where you are going, you will probably end up somewhere else. Lawrence J. Peter
For he purrs in thankfulness, when God tells him he's a good cat.... Christopher Smart
There is no need for a piece of sculpture in a home that has a cat. Wesley Bates
The smallest feline is a masterpiece. Leonardo Da Vinci
To err is human, to purr is feline. Robert Byrne
If a cat spoke, it would say things like, "Hey I don't see the problem here." Roy Blount, Jr.
Purring would seem to be... an automatic safety-valve device for dealing with happiness overflow. Monica Edwards
And the sun and moon sometimes argue over who will tuck me in at night. If you think I am having more fun than anyone else on this planet you are absolutely correct. Hafiz
When you wish upon a star, makes no difference who you are. Jimmeny Cricket
Last night the moon came dropping its clothes in the street. I took it as a sign to start singing, falling up into the bowl of sky. Jelaluddin Rummi
When I die I'm going to dance first in all the galaxies...I'm gonna play and dance and sing. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
Knock on the sky and listen to the sound. Zen saying
Dreaming permits each and every one of us to be quietly and safely insane every night of our lives. Charles William Dement |
